Sorting out Who's On First – Part 1 of 2

It was a dark and stormy night, as fourteen Board members sat around the polished marble conference table in the Do-Good Citywide Charity. It was the evening before the start of DGCC's largest ever capital campaign, and the following morning these Board members would be hard at work, on their phones and in their cars. They would be talking to people, asking people to contribute significantly to the marvelous new service facility that would soon be erected – one that was futuristic enough to stimulate the imagination, but cost-effective enough to satisfy anyone’s desire for frugality.

The topic they were discussing this evening had to do with approaches to donors. Everyone in the room was abuzz with excitement and they all talked at once. George’s statement about approaching Karl and Mary triggered something in Herb’s memory that he should make sure to visit the Simpsons and the Johnsons, but in reverse order. Helen and Thelma were off in one corner exchanging notes about their closest friends. Everyone was adding prospective donors to their lists.

All of a sudden, the Chairman of the Board, Brent Lewis, groaned in a theatrical voice and said, so that everyone could hear, “Where do we start? How do we know who we’re going to solicit first, second and third? I only have so much time in a day, so at best I can do five solicitations a week. But how do we know what the best order is for soliciting. If we hit Mary first, and then Sam, it might lead Sam to feel offended; on the other hand Joyce might get herself all out of joint if she’s approached before Mary gives. Oh, what are we going to do?!”

"Well that's a fine kettle of rotten fish," said Merv Thomas.

"Why didn't someone work these details out in advance," complained Marty Bloom. "I've been on dozens of boards and usually this is all worked out by the staff in advance."

"Oh you won't find anything like that around here," Herb Marwill said bitterly. I've done two other campaigns with this board over the years and have come to believe we simply can't plan things out in advance. We don't know how to do that."

(Well, the board members seem very upset. Needless to say, dear reader, we have quite a pickle here. I'll bet you've been party to a scene like this; what's your thought? Can we get some resolution on this problem, or will the board members take this little incident into the campaign as a sour note for a beginning to their effort? Ah-h-h, but you'll have to wait until tomorrow's post to see what happens next.)